As I detailed in my back to blogging post, Monday's will be dedicated to several things: experiences, do/don'ts of motherhood, nurse blogs and toddler meltdowns.
Today I would like to touch on toddler meltdowns.
I can remember vividly when I got pregnant the stories I got about how rough the toddler years would be. Everyone and their mother wants to tell you about the "terrible two's." And if they told you anymore than that you likely forgot because you were permanently scarred. Oh, that was just me? Shoot.
Now let me preface a few things here, I was not the best behaved little girl or teenager, I am as bull-headed as they come and well to the say the least as a teenager I was a drama queen. There aren't many stories that I have heard of Chris having an attitude problem or being rebellious, but he is also extremely strong-willed and hard-headed much like myself. Neither one of us will easily accept the word no and definitely choke down our pride when we discover we are wrong.
Chris and I had long drawn out conversations about this as we prepared for Alex's birth. We would often sit and wonder, "Will Alex be born with my temperament or yours?" "Will he go through the terrible two's or will he lay it on that much thicker as a teenager?"
We thought we were so prepared, we had game plans and strategies and what we would stand firm on and what we would let slide. Then came a 2 year old.....
We were so prepared for the worst of the worst, Alex had shown little bits and pieces of his temper in the past, for example, this baby tantrum.
Our 2 year old seemed like a walk in the park compared to what everyone had prepared us for, of course there were days that were particularly trying and days we thought, "Oh my goodness they were right." But it was nothing we couldn't handle.
Then our little fella turned 3, we both felt an instant wave of peace and relief come over us, We had made it out of the terrible two's with little to no damage. We called ourselves the "lucky ones."
Then an exact 2 weeks later it was like someone stole our sweet little angel and replaced him with an emotional teenager trapped in a 3 year old's body.
No one had ever said 3 could be worse than 2 EVER, or at least that we remembered. Once we started reaching out to friends and other parents within our church, the stories came flooding in, "Oh yeah, there were days we considered just putting our kid in time out as soon as he woke up, in hopes it would teach him a lesson." WHY DIDN'T ANYONE PREPARE US FOR AGE 3?!?
Our 2 year old seemed like a walk in the park compared to what everyone had prepared us for, of course there were days that were particularly trying and days we thought, "Oh my goodness they were right." But it was nothing we couldn't handle.
Then our little fella turned 3, we both felt an instant wave of peace and relief come over us, We had made it out of the terrible two's with little to no damage. We called ourselves the "lucky ones."
Then an exact 2 weeks later it was like someone stole our sweet little angel and replaced him with an emotional teenager trapped in a 3 year old's body.
No one had ever said 3 could be worse than 2 EVER, or at least that we remembered. Once we started reaching out to friends and other parents within our church, the stories came flooding in, "Oh yeah, there were days we considered just putting our kid in time out as soon as he woke up, in hopes it would teach him a lesson." WHY DIDN'T ANYONE PREPARE US FOR AGE 3?!?
Now that we were experiencing the "Traumatic Three's" as we have come to know them people have begun to warn us about many other ages and stages in life, the prepubescent years, preteens, teenagers and once they leave the house, each one seeming scarier than the next. It kind of took the wind out of our sails at how well we thought we were doing with raising our child.
That was until I had a revelation, if you could call it that. Our son is an amazing child. This is an incredibly hard time for any parent, toddlers are made to test boundaries and your patience. I acted the same way towards my parents as did Chris. It's how children grow as people and become well behaved and respectful teenagers and adults. This phase in life will repeat itself over and over again, but your duty in each phase is to love them through it. They are just as overwhelmed as you are with all of the emotions and changes going on inside of them and this is the only way they know how to cope with it all at this point.
I hope you can remember that the next time your child is having a "rough day." It's not that they are being "bad," they are just simply growing and maturing into real people, experiencing tremendous life change and a wide array of emotions that will never be able to be understood. So during these times hold them tighter, bring them closer and love them trough it.
That was until I had a revelation, if you could call it that. Our son is an amazing child. This is an incredibly hard time for any parent, toddlers are made to test boundaries and your patience. I acted the same way towards my parents as did Chris. It's how children grow as people and become well behaved and respectful teenagers and adults. This phase in life will repeat itself over and over again, but your duty in each phase is to love them through it. They are just as overwhelmed as you are with all of the emotions and changes going on inside of them and this is the only way they know how to cope with it all at this point.
I hope you can remember that the next time your child is having a "rough day." It's not that they are being "bad," they are just simply growing and maturing into real people, experiencing tremendous life change and a wide array of emotions that will never be able to be understood. So during these times hold them tighter, bring them closer and love them trough it.
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